Seeking Attention

This blog is also posted at the Christian Women's Resource Network

I am such a hypocrite. The other day I felt a need to step out of my comfort zone and obey a prompting from God. It was a pretty public place and I did something that was apparently helpful for another person while everyone else was trying hard to ignore the situation. It was good that I was obedient; it would have been really easy to push that little nudge aside and ignore it.

But it didn't end there. All day long I patted myself on the back for stepping out and obeying. Wasn't it good of me to do that? I so wanted to tell people about the situation -- it was an unusual situation, after all. And I was a really obedient, good Christian to do what I did. Good for me, huh? I was proud that I actually obeyed and didn't chicken out, and I wanted to tell someone about it.

But Jesus himself tells us to "Watch out! Don't do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. When you give to someone in need, don't do as the hypocrites do -- blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get." (Matthew 6:1,2)

Why is it so important to have worldly feedback on my deeds? Why should I care? I'm sure I bit my tongue at least four times to prevent myself from telling others about that day (and in all honesty, this blog probably counts as blurting it out anyway). What good is a pat on the back from my friends and family, when what I really need is to be so obedient that it isn't a big deal when I do what my Father tells me to do?

I want to do my earthly job so naturally that I would think no more of an act of obedience to God that I do putting on my socks each morning. And what would be so special about sharing THAT?

God, please forgive my pride and the times when I am not obedient to your calling. Help me seek your reward only, not earthly reward. Let me see the world as you do, listen for your gentle nudge, and take action immediately when there is a need -- without seeing it as anything unusual or special. Help me focus on you and you alone as I go through each day. In Jesus precious name I pray, Amen.